Femme Power

Archive for the ‘Family and Parenting’ Category

My daughter handed me a piece of paper that almost made me cry with glee.   The paper was folded thrice so that it had more dramatic sides to flip over and read her notes.   On the front fold, her crooked handwriting said “You are the best mommy in the world.”  I almost cried.  I never thought she would think of me like that  nor would she surprise me like she did.   In the inner folds, she said “Are you there, mommy?” and “So? I love you!”  She was innocently smiling while she watched me read her notes.  What good have I done that God gave me this kind of blessing for a daughter?   She’s such a sweet angel!  I cuddled her and we both read the note at the back of the paper. It said, “I love you, mommy” opposite to a  cute heart drawing that she herself made.

I couldn’t ask for more.   God has sent me an angel…and her name is Bianca.

One of a mother’s biggest dilemma is getting sandwiched between her career and family obligations.  More often than not, it’s painfully hard to juggle and balance both work and home responsibilities.   We, moms, get the beating because we have on our shoulders the duty to look after our kids and we have the desire to be there for them physically as they grow - to watch their steps, language, manners, etc.  On the other hand, we also want to help augment the family’s financial capacity.  Although our husbands have those duties too, they tend to be more focused on providing for the family while we, moms, want to get the best of both worlds.

I left my managerial job less than a year ago because my day job was consuming me, I barely had quality time left for my family.  I couldn’t even attend PTA meetings nor my daughter’s Recognition Day.

Now that I’m home-based, I feel secure that my family is well taken care of (by me, lol!) and they’re so thankful about it.  However, I feel the need to contribute more moolah for the family so we could stash more savings to our bank accounts in preparation for our plan to purchase a house.  My earnings from blogging help pay the bills and buy us some grocery items (but not YET enough to pay for a two-bedroom house’s monthly amortization). But I think it’s fair enough.   After all, it is blogging that saves me from insanity in having nobody to talk to around the house when the hubby and the kid are both out.

A day job wouldn’t be possible anymore because I don’t have a nanny and I’ve no intention of getting one after the last nanny terrorized my daughter.     So what’s the best to do?  What about a job with a graveyard shift?  Call Centers abound nearby and they’re constantly hiring due to the growing demand from the global market.

Indeed, I guess the Lord has a way of showing you His blessings in the most unexpected places.   I was walking around the neighborhood one day and found a sign that says “Hiring Call Center Agent.”  I got interested mainly due to proximity - merely a walking distance from the house.  To make the story short, I handed my resume after two days of thinking it over.   Today at 3:27 pm, I got a call from my would-be employer, Carlo, who asked me to report tonight!

So I guess this is it.   I’m giving it a good shot again to get the best of both worlds.  I have everything figured out already on how to manage my time when I get home from work and before I go to work.  This time, having no nanny won’t be a problem and I can attend to my daughter after I get enough sleep in the day.   It somehow gives me a sense of security to be home for my 8-year-old during the day even though I’d probably sleep till late afternoon.   At least she’s free to poke me anytime she needs to.

Wish me luck, guys!   I’ll keep on blogging.

My daughter is turning 8 years old tomorrow. The big question is: With the current economy that’s not too promising, is it still practical to throw a party? My hubby and I have given it much thought and we’ve actually discussed it with our little one.  This is going to be the first time that my daughter won’t have a birthday party.

But that’s not to say that there won’t be any celebration.  We just decided that we’d spend the day together as a family somewhere else.  My hubby, being a surprise freak, hasn’t divulged yet (even to me) the place where he’s taking us to celebrate.   We’re all very excited! Despite my daughter’s initial hesitation to give in to our plan, she’s now beginning to appreciate the alternative surprise that her dad is brewing for her birthday. She even started her countdown since two weeks ago.

Throwing a party is not a bad thing, in fact, it’s a perfect time to socialize with other kids and be the center of attraction for a day.  However I don’t believe that not throwing a birthday party means we love our daughter less. My parents gave me a birthday bash only once - when I turned 18! But it never crossed my mind to envy other kids who had cakes to blow and friends to hobnob with during their birthdays.   I understood my parents’ financial situation very well.   The difference now is that I’m capable of showing my daughter two options: to spend or to save.   I let her understand that we have money to spend for her birthday but it’s not much.  Spending it would mean sacrificing her savings.

If we don’t spend on a birthday bash, we can deposit the amount to my daughter’s savings account and be able to sleep soundly.  And that, I think, is wiser.

image courtesy of askville.amazon.com/superhero

A friend of mine asked me this a few days after I decided to leave the rat race to be a “plain housewife.”    I mused about it and realized, it’s no plain being a housewife at all.

As a full-time homemaker, you get to wear many hats. You’re a financial planner, events organizer, cook, plumber, carpenter, teacher, nurse, interior decorator, gardener other than being a mom, wife and bestfriend.

Now tell me, is there anything plain about being a housewife?

Going nuts about the daily chores that don’t seem to end in your household?   We share the same sentiment. Sometimes I say to myself it’s easier to run an office than a household.   There have to be ways in making things a little bit easier for stay-at-home moms to stay sane and comfortable even without a maid.

I asked other moms in the neighborhood how they cope with the daily toils of being a homemaker and here’s what they told me:

1. Clean as you go.  If this rule serves well in public places, why not in our household?  This engages the other members of the family to help clean up clutters ASAP instead of YOU doing all the work when they’re all off to their own lives.   It might not be that easy to impose on some of your household members but eventually, they will, with proper pushing.   What a breather it would be if they’ll automatically clean up the table after eating, wash the dishes or put their clothes directly into the hamper instead of flinging them over the sofa and everywhere.  You’ll be surprised how much time you’ll save when you’re not alone in putting things back to their proper places in bulk.

2. Plan your groceries.   List down what you need before rushing to the grocers.   This will save not only time but money as well.   According to market researcher Paco Underhill in the book Why We Buy:The Science of Shopping, supermarkets are “places of high impulse buying…Fully 60% to 70% of purchases there were unplanned.”

3. Invest on good-quality home essentials.   Examples: A PVA mop with a wringer (and is highly absorbent) is more practical than a standard mop that you need to manually wash and wring with your own hands.   An automatic washing machine will cost you about thrice the price of an ordinary washing machine but the convenience caused by the former will more than offset the price difference.  Your time and energy are too precious to be focused on the laundry and the cleaning.

4. Know your neighbors/Keep emergency numbers handy. It doesn’t mean you need to snoop around everybody in the neighborhood but at least try to familiarize and socialize with some of them.   Our family is barely a few months old in our neighborhood and I know how it feels to having no one to ask for help nearby in case of emergency.   Good thing our neighbors are easy to get along with.   Now I know who to call when the pipes have leaks, when an appliance breaks down, when a furniture needs fixing, etc.   Be good to your neighbors and they’ll reciprocate.  A neighbor even looks after my daughter whenever I’m late in fetching her up from school.  You don’t know when you’re gonna need a bunch of helping hands.

List down the contact numbers of the nearest police station, hospital, and fire station and put them beside the phone, store them in your cellphone, or stick them on your fridge with magnets.   Thing is, keep them visible for everyone just in case the need arises…though hopefully not.

5. Make time for yourself.   Not because you’ve devoted your life to serving your family means that you’ve turned your back on yourself.   Get a life.   Make time (not just try to find time) for yourself where you can relax, be alone, and do what you love to do (in my case, malling, reading and blogging/writing) every once in a while.  If you can do it everyday, then good for you! Being productive never fails to make us feel good about ourselves.   So why shouldn’t we?

Just got back from the doc.   We’ve confirmed that it’s German Measles that’s affecting my 7-year-old.   I finally completed the prescribed meds after asking the pedia to change the hard-to-find Hydroxyzine to anything equally effective against itching.  She came up with Diphenhydramine.

However, I worry about my daughter’s swollen eyelids.  It makes her face look a little puffy this morning.   Unfortunately, I didn’t get much answer from her pedia about it earlier (she seemed confused too) so I decided to search the internet for some useful information about German Measles.   I’m glad to have found a site that offers valuable information for parents about kids’ diseases and German Measles is of course there.

It somehow gave me a breath of fresh air to learn that German Measles is a mild illness in kids and that it “resolves on its own.”   I also found out that the puffiness around her eyes is one of the symptoms of German Measles (the doctor earlier feared possible complications that may have caused my daughter’s puffy eyes and it gave me the creeps when she mentioned kidneys!).  But the doctor said she’s not raising the alarm since my daughter’s fever has subsided, her blood pressure is normal so it could mean her suspicion is incorrect.

My research helped me understand that my daughter’s swollen eyelids and pink eyes could be mild conjuctivitis which could have been affected by some allergies or infections (like bacteria or viruses) which are also brought about by German Measles.   I also learned that the rashes typically last three days but the swollen lymph nodes may take about a week to cure.

Doctor’s advice is to continue monitoring my child’s temperature and give her the prescribed medication on schedule.   I am less tense now that I know more about German Measles.   I was getting quite paranoid when I was totally in the dark about this illness.

I’d like to give credit to the people behind the website kidshealth.org.  They have loads of useful information about children’s health that every parent must know.  I decided to keep them handy by including them in my Hall of Fame links.

Just wanted to share some photos of my daughter Bianca and her cousin Angel in two separate beaches in Davao City.  They’re no white sand but these resorts are clean and exceptionally cheap!   (Less than P50 entrance fee)

Who says you can’t have much fun with cheap thrills?

In these beach resorts in Dumoy Toril, your kids can play all day after swimming.  Their playground at Mergrande Beach is huge and well-kempt, grown-ups can’t help but play too!

When you’re in Davao, finding a nice yet cheap beach resort is never too hard.   They are sprawling in Dumoy, Toril, Matina and Samal Island.   The cheap yet clean ones are in Dumoy, Toril and some in Matina but if you want more adventure, go cross the Island City of Samal and feast your eyes on the lineup of resorts.

Ready to beach around?