Pamanhikan in the Philippines
Pamanhikan is a Filipino pre-wedding tradition where a man asks for a woman’s hand in marriage, with the blessings of her parents. Normally, it is done by going to the woman’s house (or in a neutral place like a restaurant, etc.) to meet with her parents and other family members and to formally discuss the boyfriend’s wedding proposal. It normally comes with a dinner or a party hosted by the woman’s family as prelude to the upcoming union. The family of the would-be groom brings gifts and food as custom too. Some pamahikans are grand and festive, some are practical and simple. It is during the pamanhikan where the wedding plans are laid out and agreed upon by both parties.
I don’t know what other countries are practicing this but it is common in the Philippines. My kuya (older brother) and my parents did just that a couple of days ago. They drove for five hours from Davao City to Cagayan de Oro City to meet with the family of my kuya’s fiancee. The pamanhikan went well and I can never get more excited than this - My kuya is getting married! Kuya Ryan, a military officer, is finally tying the knot with his doctor girlfriend this November. That means I’ll have to fly back to my home island Mindanao for the wedding celebration and fulfill my kuya’s request that I take charge of the after-wedding program as emcee.
I’ll be more than glad! It’ll be great to be part of this important event in my kuya’s life. I also can’t wait to see my parents and siblings again. I know it’s going to be a lovely wedding!
Posted in Family and Parenting
August 16th, 2009 10:17 pm
Congrats to your older brother in this upcoming wedding. The pamanhikan sounds so interesting. What a beautiful tradition. My husband proposed and then we drove to my parents house to announce the news. No celebration or ceremony.
August 17th, 2009 9:20 am
wow, congratulations to your brother Rochelle, wish them well that the wedding preparations will go smoothly. Now, you can start making plans for the trip back home to attend the wedding
August 17th, 2009 11:40 am
I think this is a wonderful custom and maybe if more countries performed this custom, marriages would last longer. Let us know how the wedding goes in November, especially the emcee part. Have a GREAT week!
Friends 4 Life!
August 17th, 2009 1:30 pm
I can’t imagine how the boyfriend will come over with his parents and do this pamamanhikan. As in, di ko ma-imagine!
August 17th, 2009 6:17 pm
Many congrats to your brother, and his wife to be. Those kind of traditions are not practiced much in the states, any more.
August 17th, 2009 6:49 pm
That sounds wonderful And what great traditions you have. We do not have the Romance that and tradition that other countries have. I am sure you are excited about the whole thing.
August 17th, 2009 10:11 pm
Congratulations to your brother! Good luck on your visit to your hometown. Pamanhikan is a Filipino tradition that we should keep on practicing and we should pass it on to future generations.
August 20th, 2009 4:55 am
Good to hear that they are still practicing “pamanhikan” ! Congratulations to your brother and his fiancee’ !
December 1st, 2010 11:22 am
tnx… 4 the info..
December 1st, 2010 11:28 am
well, its good to hear that their are still Filipinoes who preserve the pamanhikan culture.. well actually my couzin kim jason relles is going to have his pamanhikan on Her GF diz coming december 10, 2010..